Central Air!!!

On July 5, we will have officially lived here for 19 years. 

This week, something very exciting and momentous has happened...

We got central air conditioning installed in the house!!!

I'm sure it will feel strange for quite a while, but we are SO glad and thankful to be able to do this!!!

Annah's last Velocity

We came back home today just in time for the kids to go to youth group--Annah's last one!  

Annah's not-so-little shoes

I can't seem to locate the picture anywhere now, but when Annah was very little, Jeremy took a picture of her tiny white pair of shoes sitting on one of the bottom stairs waiting to be taken up.  He said he saw them sitting there and thought about all her future pairs of shoes that would sit there as she grew up in this house.  

Of course, her shoes have been accompanied by many other pairs in this spot over the years--sometimes several pairs at a time, and siblings' shoes too, of course.  

Tonight, I was going up to bed and noticed there was only one pair--Annah's everyday Converse.  

Her daddy has bought her at least 1-3 pairs of Converse over the past several years, and they're her go-to favorites. This year, she has this rose colored pair, and pair of navy ones with white polka dots and gold eyelets.  

She has been blessed to walk and grow up in so many pairs of shoes, and I've told her a zillion times to take them up the stairs.  

I'm sure about this time next year, I will be wishing she had a pair of shoes sitting on the stairs waiting to go up.

Sweet memories

While redecorating the girls' room, we are going through absolutely everything in it, sorting, throwing away, donating, and boxing up for storage in the attic. This morning, I got started before Annah was awake, and I pulled several things off a shelf in the closet.  When she found me, I had tears streaming down my face from the memories some of these things evoked.

Jeremy and I chose this lamp and several other items with the "over the moon" theme at Babies 'R' us in Reynoldsburg, Ohio, for the nursery before Annah was born.  They were some of the only items we bought for her ourselves.

Her mobile had happy stars and moons.

I came across some of the kids' favorite books I had set aside to keep, some of the girls' baby clothes, crocheted baby blankets including the striped one in this picture that my Grandma made with a matching bag to keep it in.

Grandma also made this doll's ruffly outfit.

Bonnets and hats my mom made with matching dresses for the girls.

The missing puzzle piece to a wooden USA puzzle that's now at my parents' house.

There are some things that can't be explained, but they are connected to precious memories.  It is hard to believe Annah is now 17.  Going through her baby things, it seems like she should only be about 5 years old.  It's painful how quickly 17 years fly by, but I am ever-so-thankful they have been filled with so many wonderful moments.  My heart is full.

Putting away childhood

The first night of volleyball practice, Sylvia spent 45 minutes ransacking the house (mostly her room) trying to find her kneepads.  I went up for about 1 minute thinking I might help and saw that every drawer, corner, nook, and cranny of the girls' room was overfull and a mess.  

This morning I told Sylvia she needed to clean up the mess she made the other night and go through all of her things and LET GO of some.  Throw things in the trash; it's okay!!  Well, she decided to go through the "toy closet" and put things she and Annah don't use into bins in the attic.  Goodbye dolls and Barbies and Littlest Pet Shop toys and Strawberry Shortcakes and being a little girl.  

The girls spent many, many hours playing with Barbies and dolls in this space.  They not only loved Sylvia's Barbie house, but created many more rooms to expand the house all throughout the closet.  They used folders and cardboard boxes and duct tape and other toys and craft items.  And they really played and pretended with all of it.  

While Sylvia was a bit more of a "dolly girl" than Annah, they always played dolls together.  I remember a very difficult discussion the day last summer when Sylvia realized that Annah wasn't interested in playing with Barbies most of the time.  Sylvia didn't want to play with them by herself; she loved the pretending, acting, giggling time with Annah.  She wasn't really ready then to outgrow that special activity with her sister, and it hurt when I explained that Annah was older and it was okay for her not to want to play with dolls anymore.  Sylvia was afraid she would lose the special sister bond they shared, but understood.  When I explained Sylvia's realization to Annah, she cried too.  No bond was lost.  Memories made are now cherished, and they share tween/teen activities just as happily.  

Sylvia asked me to take pictures before they packed everything up.  I have to admit, my momma heart was having some trouble with this decision to pack these things away.  Their childhoods are passing so quickly; that's a painful realization for me.  As I came into the girls' room to take pictures, Sylvia showed me around the Barbie house and pointed out each little item they had made or repurposed.  Tears began to stream down my face.  At the same time it hurt so much to see the girls packing their childhood toys away, I am also grateful for the treasured memories they have.  I asked Sylvia to give me a tour on video.  I love the creativity they used in their play and making the space a haven that's now full of memories.  

I also share memories with them.  Many of the items they have in their room are from my own childhood.  Their furniture and lamps, Holly Hobbie items.  

The kids each have one of these pencil drawings in their rooms.  I bought them  at Hearts at Home conference years ago, and the artist personalized each of them for me.  I love the reminder they are to the kids.  

"I will not forget you!  See, I have engraved you on the palms of my hands." - Isaiah 49:15b-16a

Here is the wooden Barbie house my parents and brother and sis-in-law gave Sylvia several Christmases ago.  It has been well-loved.

The girls used the boxes their cars came in for garages.

This extra bedroom is made from plastic folders (walls), fabric scraps (carpet and blankets), pencil box (bookshelf), a pizza pressure guard thing to keep the pizza box lid from falling into the melted cheese (table/stool), and plastic ice cream dish (nightstand).

This is a bedroom made from my old Caboodles case!  

The sink, toilet, and tub in this bathroom are all made out of duct tape.

There are many other creative items throughout the house, including a shower made from a Velveeta box, and an entire patio set made from duct tape and other items.  It's all so creative and sweet.  I love the children my girls were and are.  I think they are growing up wonderfully.  I'm so blessed to be their momma and to get to watch them grow up.

The girls decided to keep the wooden Barbie house, a few Barbies, and one of the cars in the closet for little girls who may stop in to play.

"I will not forget you!  See, I have engraved you on the palms of my hands." - Isaiah 49:15b-16a

Lasts and letting go

Lately, everything seems to be pointing out the fact that time is passing quickly and I am getting older.  Many of the things have to do with the kids growing up.  Instead of the days of first milestones, we have a lot of last milestones recently.  

Like today...Annah pulled her last baby tooth.  

When pulling most of her teeth, she was much like I was as a child...waiting too long--until there was a problem--hanging by a thread, wedged between other teeth, gums bleeding, crying in fear or pain or both, always dramatic.  Sometimes Daddy had to pull them for her, after waaaaay too much crying and arguing. 

One tooth she avoided pulling for 2 years!!  That was a really bad situation.  Another time, after she knew the truth about the tooth fairy, she just said to her daddy, "Dad, I pulled a tooth.  Can I have a dollar?"
This tooth though, she just waited until it was loose, then worked on it today until it came out.  She learned, and did it well and right this time.  No drama.

I know; losing a tooth isn't really a big deal.  But it makes me pause and reflect.  

Annah's time growing up in our home is growing shorter, and I am honestly really super uncomfortable with that.    I have a lot of denial about it.  It hurts my heart to admit she is not little anymore and doesn't need me as much.  Then I am reminded that she is doing such a good job growing up, and her becoming more independent is a good thing.  She is learning to make good decisions, and she trusts Jesus with her life.  That is THE main thing.  
Even so, it is hard for my brain to reconcile and balance the need to teach, help, protect, and instruct my child with the necessity of allowing her to think on her own, make more of her own decisions, and possibly make mistakes that will grow her.  But I do know how important it is for her to learn to trust more in the Lord than in Momma!  

I remember attending the Hearts at Home National Conference one time when Lisa Whelchel was the main speaker.  I remember her talking about learning to freely give our children to the Lord.  (They are His anyway, not really our own.)  She literally had all of us mothers close our eyes, cup our hands together and "place" our children in them, then lift them up to the Lord and say, "I release you to the Lord."  I try to remind myself of that moment (and how stinking painful it was!) every time my heart hurts seeing one of my kids grow.  I don't want them only in my hands.  I want them to be in Jesus' hands, and to know they are safely there!

Oh my, look at me, all weepy over a lost tooth.  Sometimes it's the weirdest stuff that makes me stop and think.  That's what momma's do though...

"...but Mary kept all these things in her heart and thought about them often." - Luke 2:19 NLT

Struggling with God's Plan

Sometimes, a girl needs some ice cream to get her mind off things.

The time has come for my dear, sweet Sylvie girl to learn about "the facts of life," poor girl.  

At our public school, this is taught at the beginning of 5th grade. A local church has a wonderful seminar each Spring which presents this information from a distinctly christian perspective, and I wanted Sylvia to get to experience this seminar (which includes God's plan) before getting the information (which does not include God's plan) at school next Fall.  So, I sat down with her a few nights ago with a wonderful book and started to explain some things.  She did not take it well, and doesn't want to think about such things.  

Today we attended the first session of the "Your Body, God's Plan" seminar, and she did not like it one bit.  As we talked some more in the car after the seminar, she continued to struggle with not wanting anything to do with this part of God's plan.  (Boy, was I relieved to tell her that what she is learning about is not part of God's plan for her right now!!)  

We decided that ice cream was needed immediately to get her mind off the subject for a while.  She chose a strawberry cheesecake treat that was just the right thing.

"For you created my inmost being; you knit me together in my mother’s womb. I praise you because I am fearfully and wonderfully made; your works are wonderful, I know that full well. My frame was not hidden from you when I was made in the secret place, when I was woven together in the depths of the earth." - Psalm 139:13-15

Hats, help, hugs for a momma's heart

Since we told the kids about the Disney trip, they have been using everything Disney they have, creating art about Disney, and just generally finding every way possible they can think of to celebrate the thought of Disney.  Caeden has been wearing his Mickey ears hat around the house at all times.

Yesterday, I was having "one of those days" where I was just feeling really [the bad kind of] overwhelmed about all I needed to get done, how messy and dirty the house was, how I am not keeping up with life as well as I want to, and so on...  

I'd been at the school all afternoon, helping with the junior high choir and going to the assembly to see Sylvia awarded.  I took the kids right from school into town for their music lessons.  (I did have the presence of mind [Thank you, Jesus!] to take them to Wendy's for a quick Frosty for an after-school-snack, which was really fun.)  Then, I dropped them off at lessons and did some speed-shopping at Kroger, picked them up from lessons, drove home, unloaded all the groceries in the cold.  I was getting weepy by that point, and the kids were all wonderful and helped me unload and put groceries away.  

We ate fried chicken and potato chips I'd picked up at the store for supper. (Eek, how bad for us, I know!!)  The girls started in on homework and showers, and I had to, had to, had to sit down and practice music for a funeral that was today.  (That's another story, which includes my bad attitude and how God really wanted me to do something I didn't want to do.  Maybe I'll get to it later in the post...)  Anyway, as I was practicing, I decided to get up and make some hot tea.  When I walked into our filthy, messy kitchen, this is what I saw, and it brought me to tears...

Now, I was not in tears over the filthy, messy kitchen (You would think!), but over the fact that Caeden was standing there by himself, singing, rinsing dishes, and loading the dishwasher!  He is such a stubborn boy, and complains all day long every day about every chore he is asked to do.  So, when I saw him happily doing something I didn't even ask him to do, doing it joyfully, doing it by himself, and doing it because he knew it would help his mommy...I was completely overcome with emotion.  I cried, thanked him and told him how much it was helping me, how much it meant to me, and that he is a good boy.  (I think he probably half-thought I was a bit nuts, but he is getting used to my bursting into tears at any random time.)  He just said, "You're welcome, Mommy.  Sylvia helped too.  I'm just in a good mood, so I am happy to help."  Ahhhh, such a blessing from the Lord that was!!

-----------

So, today I had the honor of being the pianist for the funeral of a pastor on our district.  I had never met this pastor, but was asked by our District Superintendent, through my pastor, if I would accompany the ministers choir.  (All of the pastors on our district are required to be part of the funeral service of a fellow pastor by singing in the ministers choir--how awesome!) 

Honestly, my first reaction was two-fold: 1) I don't want to do this.  2) How do I get out of this?

My reaction was two-fold for at least two reasons: 1) The kids had today off school, and I was looking forward to spending the day home with them.  I didn't want to shove them off on someone else, namely the only friend I could think of who would be able to watch them--who was supposed to be enjoying her own kids' day off school.  2) I had never driven to the town where the funeral was, and it was over an hour away, and that petrifies me--often to the point of a physical anxiety attack.

Lame excuses, I know. But, I figured there ought to be at least a few others who actually knew this pastor, who would love the opportunity to play piano for his funeral service...Right?  Well, it turned out others were asked, and either no one wanted to play, or honestly no one else was available.  That part doesn't really matter...What matters is that it became very clear that even though I didn't want to play, God seemed to really want me there.  So, I resolved to change my attitude and I was honored to be part of the beautiful service celebrating and remembering this pastor's life.  

The drive there was actually quite easy, and I thank God for reassuring me with my iphone GPS.  (Seriously, it is amazing how much that helps my driving anxiety, and how many prayers of thanks I have offered for that tool!)  

The service was wonderful.  It was very powerful to worship with the pastors of our district and see them mourn their friend and celebrate this man's passing into heaven!  How glorious!  It really was a blessing to be part of it.  I am always blessed when I choose to obey the Lord.

-----------

This afternoon, I picked the kids up from Dawn.  They were having so much fun, it took us about 2 hours to leave.  We headed home and did some quick picking up.  Then we loaded in the car to head to town.  I dropped the girls off at Ashley's house for her birthday slumber party.  Then Caeden and I headed over to pick up Samuel to come sleep over at our house.  

Caeden has been wearing this hat for a couple weeks (minus the recent days when he's substituted the Mickey ears).  He even sleeps with it on at night sometimes.  I love that he likes it so much.  I figured he was wearing it mostly because it is super soft, but when I asked him what made it his favorite hat, he said, "My Great Grandma made it for me!"  I love that.

100 Day

As the kids were getting ready for school this morning, Caeden realized and announced that it was the 100th day of school!  The younger grades usually do special activities on 100 day, so I'm sure he was excited for it.  

But, Caeden he was happily thinking about it, Annah got a shocked look on her face and then started to tear up!  It took her a minute before she was able to voice the fact that she was surprised the school year is already more than half over.  She is sad time is passing so quickly, and that she is almost done with 5th grade.  That means she is almost finished with elementary school!  That means she will be starting middle school in the fall!  All those thoughts seemed to be hitting her all at that moment and she couldn't contain them.  

I was surprised she felt that way, but I'm very glad she doesn't wish her childhood away.  Precious girl, stay little as long as you can!!

Pediatrician visit

Both girls visited their pediatrician today. Annah had her ears flushed to get out tons of extra wax. She did very well once she was convinced that it wouldn't hurt. She got to eat lunch at McDonald's for her reward. Sylvia is finally back on the growth chart, and the doctor gave the okay for her to switch from formula to whole milk! Yay! We like the idea of $2/week much better than the $33/week her formula has been! Sylvie grew 2 1/2 inches and gained 3 pounds, 2 ounces in the past 3 months. We have been working and praying hard for this! She did very well with her 3 shots today too.

Growing through winter

Early January 2001

When Annah hits the toys just right 
the music and lights on her gym come on.

"Tummy time is not so bad now that I can hold my head up on my own!"

"I can't quite reach those toys!"

"Daddy makes such funny faces!"

"Thanks for the Minnie Mouse ears Andy and Julie!
Can I go with you next time?"

An ornery smile

"Wow, that flash was bright!"

"This Super Saucer is pretty neat!  What do I play with first?!"

Just after bathtime

Annah's first piano lesson

Annah is now a pro at thumb sucking!

Sometimes just the thumb is not enough.

"I think I need a new hair stylist!"

 I'm growing so fast!